My Continuous Struggle...
Another half year has passed.
Can I please start 2023 over? No? No time machine available?
Okay. *rolls up sleeves*
This year has been just as difficult as the last two. Trying to restart, recharge, revive, a writing career on life support purely because of the muses. The mind is continually working, but the body always finds something more interesting to do.
Nah, not today, Shar. You could veg and watch Youtube. No stress to that, right?
And unfortunately, the body has won out more times than not, which explains my lack of productivity. The spaces on my word count calendar are abysmal, but yet I don’t think my career is dead... yet.
After a promising beginning of the year, all the goals and promises had been forgotten. Then, I had a flash of brilliance strike in June writing for a week straight, but July went by without that many words on the page. I’ve finished the short I was working on, but I didn’t want to put it up for sale since it’s my first release in over two years.
So, I thought, I’ll give it away for free because it’s based off existing characters and only the people who’ve read the existing book will get it. And then it was, my mailing list is dead, my website is outdated. So, I started looking at my mailing list, and redoing my site, and now I see a little progress but still not where I need to be.
I’ve got many stories sitting on my drive unfinished, but no desire to tackle them at the moment. There’s rewrites I planned, but again, no motivation.
Instead, I decided to start a new story. Something fresh, something exciting in a world of characters I’ve already built. My goal is December 27th, for release because A, it’s my 52nd birthday and B, it will be the best present to myself.
Why you ask?
Because through all this turmoil of fighting with anxiety and grief, I’d like to celebrate something more than just adding another year. It will be a huge accomplishment in my fourteen years of writing.
I even came up with a new tag line for both my pennames, which I’m still perfecting, but I’m going to try because it truly describes what I love to write.
All this just to tell you I’m still trying. Still battling the above issues along with lack of motivation because I have a lot of stories to tell. Motivation might be low, but I intend to get this book complete and released by that date.
Hopefully this is where I finally regain the confidence I once had because I know I can write.
It’s just finding the passion that’s been lost so I can move on to the next chapter in my writing career.
Wish me luck and thanks for listening to me ramble.